Ways...

"God works in mysterious ways"

I roll my eyes automatically when I hear that phrase, mostly because it has been said to me by well-meaning people who are at a loss to explain why life is hard or doesn't make sense. To me it always seemed like a platitude rather than a truth.

Let's be honest...

God works in some seriously bizarre messed-up and not-so-fun-at-the-time ways...and I have to say I'm actually thankful for that. Because it means that even in the midst of mistakes and crushed hopes and struggles, I can actually hang onto that truth that somehow God is working through this, through me and Aaron to move us in the next direction of our lives.

As we started this week, we were collectively holding our breath...waiting to see what disaster would hit us, since last week held so many pitfalls - culminating when a deer collided with our car. Amazingly this week really only had one disappointment, which we took in stride.

I can't really put my finger on what exactly helped change our outlook and attitudes, but I'm betting it is on our decision to stop reacting and being overwhelmed by things we cannot control. That doesn't mean we sit back and do nothing to find Aaron full time work or stop searching for a creative solution to finance the repair of our deer-bashed car. It really just means that we finally just let go. For two people who really enjoy controlling our lives, it hasn't been easy!

But when we finally agreed to let go of all that worry over finances and our future, just keep putting one foot in front of the other and most importantly give all of that over to God...we both felt like a weight had been lifted. Of course things aren't perfect. Of course we'll have rough days and frustrating times. The difference is the change in our perspective.

Today was interesting. We spent almost the entire day at church and are exhausted...Aaron led worship in 4 different services while fighting a chest cold and I spent plenty of time running after my favorite 2 year old Sunday school class while trying not to get sick to my stomach.













Our pastor's message was incredible, you can check it out here: http://orbc.net/messages.htm

This was the first Sunday we decided to tithe in a long time and its something that we plan on doing regularly and are looking forward to seeing how God is going to use that in our future.

We decided to join a small group and went to a "connection" event at the church to try to get synced up with one and guess what? Aaron is now LEADING a small group.

Ok God. Seriously? Are you chuckling up there?

Its a 6 week group we're trying out, so we'll see how it goes - I'm excited to see how being involved in a small group is really going to grow us in our faith and in relationships with the rest of the people in our group.

At A Loss...

There are only so many times you can tell yourself "this situation isn't permanent" or "things will get better" or "something HAS to give, right?" before it just doesn't work anymore.

Most of you know the struggles we've been having since Aaron was laid off in June of 2010, but lately it seems as if the hits just keep on coming. We barely have time to pick ourselves up before something else gets lobbed at us.

Last week's hits were:

1. Aaron got jury duty...for the ENTIRE MONTH OF MARCH and since he isn't working a full time job, he doesn't get reimbursed for hours wasted sitting in a courthouse when he could be working the few shifts he gets each month.
2. The allergist finally figured out (he thinks) what has been making me so miserable for 6+ months and put me on an antibiotic...which costs $184 since my insurance only covers 20% of prescription costs.
3. We hit a deer. REALLY?! On the way home from small groups. REALLY?! Oh and we don't have comprehensive coverage on our 10+ year old car so we're on the hook for the repair costs ourselves. REALLY?!

I'm not at a pity-party point...I'm about 4 months past that, right now we're just at a complete loss over what to do. It seems every time we get a little good news or a possibility of Aaron getting full time hours ANYWHERE it falls through or is massively overshadowed by horrifying news. Completely at a loss...we didn't even have the energy to really get upset over the whole deer vs. car thing - it was more of a "well, yeah. of course that happened to us right now." kind of moment. And I know people who are suffering too, many dealing with worse things than we are. I'm not saying that we are the most unfortunate people on the planet...far from it! We have so much we can truly be thankful for (that our marriage is strong enough to function throughout this is a big one!), but I just don't know how to weather this. We're so defeated, discouraged and just feeling beat up.

So if you can, please pray for us - we just have no idea where to turn and what to try next.

Window Shopping

There is nothing quite like "window shopping" for houses/apartments on craigslist. There's always that nagging fear in the back of my mind that these are complete scams...still, there's something fun about just clicking on the listings and checking out the pictures of the homes to see what they look like.

This one is listed for $800 a month and seems WAY too good to be true...

Then there's this one, described as a "cottage". Yeah...you say "cottage" I say "trailer" - definitely calling the whole thing off!

And my favorite of course..."charming 2 bedroom duplex" should really read "haven't you always wanted to live in a haunted house for only $700 a month?"










Oh craigslist...how you never cease to amaze/disgust/entertain me!