Fiona in January

Fiona in January

Thursday, July 19, 2012

It was the worst of days...it was the WORST of days!

Yesterday was a really tough day.  Seriously, the worst day I've had in a long time and that includes the day I actually had a c-section after being in labor for almost an entire day.  It was a day where the realization that being a parent is a 24/7 job I am in no way prepared for slapped me across the face. 

Over the past month, Baby Knives has been a pretty mellow kid.  Not really fussy, only waking up to eat and then going back to sleep.  However, on Monday she turned one month old and apparently all of that was about to change as she decided to wreak havoc on her unsuspecting parents.

It was one of those days that I've honestly been dreading since we found out I was pregnant.  A day where no matter what we did, neither one of us could settle her down.  She would sleep for maybe 30 minutes at a time, then wake up fussy but not really hungry either.  It was a truly miserable day for all of us, plus my husband and I were already running on maybe 3 hours of sleep.

The day ended with me feeding her at about 10pm, rocking in the recliner in the living room, bawling my eyes out saying, "I love you so much sweetie, but I absolutely hate this!"  Thankfully after that she finally went down to sleep and my husband took the first "shift" with the monitor and I got to sleep for almost 4 continuous hours before swapping with him so he could get a few hours.

Today has been much better with her - for some reason she decided to completely change how she sleeps and wants to eat overnight and expecting us to keep up.  For the past month she's been perfectly happy eating about every 3 hours, sleeping most of the rest of the time in her swing with the white noise machine on.  Now she doesn't really like the swing during the day, but will sleep in it at night.  During the day she wants to be out on the couch in the living room snoozing in her boppy pillow for 2 hours or so at a time and only eating maybe every 4 hours, but much larger amounts.

Face. Palm.

This whole parenting an ever-changing newborn thing is wearing on me for sure.  And I know just as soon as we get used to this new phase with her, she'll grow and change all over again, more than likely putting us through the wringer.  So thankful for this guy and how awesome of a dad he is, I can't imagine trying to struggle through this on my own without him to lean (and sometimes sleep) on!


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