Some days I have to wonder how in the world I’ve landed here…in this job, in this city, in this particular spot in life.
Not to get all philosophical and retrospective on you, but it has always intrigued me how the network of choices I’ve made thus far has led me to where I am today. Not to mention the fact that I’m only 26 years into this life and have an enormously overwhelming future in front of me. It’s a very “choose your own adventure” feeling. In some ways I feel like my life is just starting, but in other ways it feels like I’ve lived through a ridiculous amount of events and experiences already. Somewhere between the two perspectives I find myself balanced.
In a meandering way, I just explained why I got “The more I see the less I know” tattooed on my right forearm. Each tattoo I have (6 of them so far) represents a specific event or turning point in my life. I got the forearm done right after I found out my first book was being published. I wanted a tattoo to mark how special that moment was, as well as something that represented my particular view of life. I settled on that phrase partially because it is a sentence that appears in the book and because every time I look at it, it reminds me that I don’t know everything and more importantly other people’s views and opinions are valid…it reminds me to keep an open mind.
For the first time in my life I don’t have a plan…it feels very weird. I knew how to do the whole growing up thing, the high school thing, the college thing and even the starving/broke/crappy job after college thing. But that’s as far as I ever went in my mind. And now I’m getting married to my best friend in the world, and it’s fantastic – but honestly? I have no plan…I have no concept of what life is going to be like from this point forward. It’s exciting…sure…but terrifying is another word that springs to my over-organized/used to planning everything brain.
So how do I let go and just enjoy the ride?